Meri Jaan, recently, I was speaking with some folks that have moved back to India. We were talking about what they really missed of the US, and apart from the obvious basic civic sense, Infrastructure, People-n-Courtesies, Overall cleanliness in the environment, most mentioned that they really missed those feeling-desi days.
Days like going to events like an Indian concert, or those Indian Independence Day parade or those Heritage India events. Those small moments of bringing home desi grocery, CD, DVD, desi paper, enjoying apna food, apne stalls, the desh-bhakti-ka-jazba, some remote celebrity sightings (hey I saw Ranjeet) and the desi celebrations (lets play antakshiri) !
Some said they missed the fact that sometimes they would really park their car in the garage and wait to listen to my radio show (in Hindi) on EBC, or even things like watching AVS used to be something not to be missed.
Its like they were trying to re-create every moment of India in the US, and now that they were back in India, there was nothing to look forward to.
In India, Paani Puri is in abundance, Chole bature, hakka noodles, dosa-idli, gobi manchurian, chicken lolipop is everywhere, and so is the Indian-ness. So, now they were feeling lost back in Swades :)
I think it is very natural to be lost. I also had that desi longing for a long time, and every year when I used to see the desi flag in full flow, I used to get that layer-of-moistness in the eyes. It is very normal Meri Jaan, to miss that Paani puri or Chaat because internally we really do miss apna desh when we live abroad.Its our country, our food, Meri Jaan, its apni identity in this world !!!
But, is that not the same here? I still miss those Mexican-Chevys joints, Macaroni Grills and Olive Gardens, or the TGIFs?? I miss the ease of walking into a BJs, or Sams club, or even a Walmart and buying all that you need.
But things are changing this end too. Malls are becoming bigger, shops like Walmart and joints like TGIFs are coming up in abundance. Tou, time tou lagega, but the bigger thing is and I am sure most will agree is that it is tough-er to make the move from Vides to Des, than from Des to Videsh !
Also, because we have made our lives abroad, to simply abandon it and move back and dstart from the base, takes a lot of courage !!
But, if you look at it a little differently; Even in the US, if you walk into any Merrill Lynch, Credit Suisse, Citibank, JP Morgan or for that matter any IT floor, all you will see is more than 60% apna desi public and few mix of chinese and then some Gora/ Latino public.
If you live in areas where you can have your mix of Indian and Videshi crowd, you are ok. Same is happening here too. Whoa !!! Tou phir problem kya hain? Does it matter - if it is Nariman Point or Hudson Pier?? Epiphany - kyun?? Why are we still thinking in terms of des-pardes?
Bottomline, being lost is OK !! And then again, this is 2011-going to 2012. Life has changed, it is no more the 70s or 80s, when videsh was still - Phoren.
Depending on where you decide to live, atleast in Swades, from what I have seen, kids will defnitely be much free-er, they will have more sensory perceptions, they may be a little more protected but they will always have more street smartness, and I dont have to mention about studies and the curriculum in schools and then basically you have Apne-Log as against the Yule-log (American TV on a Christmas night, anyone :)
Tou Meri Jaan, there is really not much difference between the Hamptons or the Himachals, Pointpleasant or the Aksa beach.
If you are still with me and reading this blog, to keep you motivated, Ek Story yaad aati hain about a parrot in a Raja's palace.
There was once a parrot in a Raja's palace.
Every day, the parrot abided by the Raja's demands. To keep the Raja happy, day in and day out, the parrot used to sing to the Raja's tunes. He used to pay his dues to keep the Raja happy, and was scared that if it did someting wrong, the Raja would throw it out of the cage and palace.The Raja was very happy and used to kept the parrot in an ironcage. The parrot also felt great staying in the iron cage and yes, in the Raja's palace.
The Raja used to feed the parrot very well, and used to give him lots of jawaar to eat. Raja used to tell the parrot that if he did what the Raja said, then one day, the Raja would give the parrot a golden chair.The parrot was very happy, always waiting for the day he would sit on that golden chair and maybe one day he would get THE golden cage.
One day the great day came and the parrot got the golden chair, but after sitting on the chair, he did not feel any different, as he was still inside the cage, just a little higher. One day, he also got the golden cage, but he still did not feel free.
Finally, one evening, the parrot was looking outside his cage, looking up in the sky.
The parrot saw all the other parrots flying outside the palace. They were probably not given that much to eat, but most of them seemed very happy, well spirited and free. Ek Din, a fakeer went by the palace singing a song "Sone ke pinzre ko chod ke dekh, zindagi ka saamna karke tou dekh".So, one fine day the parrot decided that jo bhi ho, I am not going to stay in this golden cage, I want to be free!
I have the golden chair, I have Golden Cage, I have unlimited jawaar, but where is the life?
Next day, when the Raja asked him to do something, the parrot did what he felt was right! He refused to abide by the Raja's orders. The Raja got really furious and told his soldiers to remove the bird from the cage, and released the parrot out in the sky!
The parrot was a little shaken, but once he was in the sky he could see the open skies, the horizon-zenith, the limitless expansion, and most importantly, his freedom and his happiness.Alas ! The parrot was free, he was no longer in that cage. The parrot had become Ek Azaad Parinda !!!
Tou then, coming back to our discussion, dont worry too much if you are really keen and planning to come back or Return to India (r2I). Things have really changed and the people too.
Meri Jaan, you can never make India - America/UK or vice-versa. But dont be scared to come back to apni country. If you want to, seize the moment and take the leap !
Ek Sheyr pesh hain: (Irshaad tou bolo !! )
Nazar aur Nazaaron ka aisa nazraana hota hain kabhi-kabhi,
Ke Uski nazrein karam nazar hi nahin aati !
Raah hoti hain, safar hota hain, aur humsafar bhi hote hain,
Lekin, Zindagi door door tak nazar nahin aati !
Bheja Fry message in this post Diwali week:
In the end, it is all about what makes YOU free from YOUR Bindings, YOUR miseries, gives YOU what YOU need and makes YOU happy.
If thats what it is, tou phir it really does not matter - chaahe woh videsh ho, ya apna desh !!Tou Meri Jaan, with Diwali week almost over, I am really enjoying the most in Apna Swades! Aapka kya hogaa?
Meri Jaan, till we meet next time, stay Safe, stay in Holiday mood, and stay in Loeve !
- Pankaj
